The Wax Conspiracy

Aperçus of Death and Biscuits

Easter road toll 2019 goes four times the four day weekend with 16

Time it right and the tail end with ANZAC day holiday nets 10 days off. Weaken it some with a day off and that’s 16, the same gone forever for the Easter period before clocking out and down for the road tolls.

Bifurcation on the national Christmas holiday road toll 2018 down to 37 splits

Screaming agony interrupts the Christmas to New Year’s period as the national holiday road toll spanning Australia’s coasts eases up and claims only 37 spillovers for the stretch.

Easter road toll 2018 swings through with 15 at stumps

Not even a cricket ball shaved on one side of the road will tamper the spirits floating off into the nether. Easter is a choc late but high on the 15 out on the boundaries.

Bumper harvest to national holiday road toll 2017 with 70 to the sirens

Literally a bumper to bumper to bumper fire and embers sale on mortality as the close out of 2017 renders a high yield crop of 70 spread out across the nation's road over Christmas and New Year's.

Cradle to the grave in the 2016 national holiday road toll with 40 no more

Carry on a wayward trio, the top three states from the last outing are back at it again as the end of the Christmas and New Year holiday road toll ends with a forty and one as NSW triumphs once more unto the bleak.

Easter road toll 2016 turns out the lights at eight

Prices for coffins and makeshift cement pits are not exactly the only cause to mangle your body into a bundle of bones. But at least when you’re screaming high unto the sky in a blinding light you don’t think about how this Easter is a quieter one nationally. Eight at the end.

Entire nation screeches in-hand at 2015 holiday road toll, 35 for the lot

Liberty takes its freedom from the metallic jaws of life, wrenching guts and entrails from the side of the road to reveal that spirits are up as the bodies are high. We're 35 for the Christmas and New Year national holiday road toll and it's a bang up job to bang up a write-off with NSW at the headless.

Easter road toll 2015 basks in miserable and magical 22

Poetry in motion as the arms and torsos fly through the shattered glass air as Australia does proud to rack 22 for the Easter holiday road toll for 2015. Soundtrack to such a mess probably including one of those songs by Taylor Swift.

Germanwings 4U9525 and Malaysia Airlines MH370 stay a night at Wayside Inn

Meeting the cost of a Sandra Bullock movie, starring a Leary who constantly draws breath between his teeth, is sky high, but what you get when you have Germanwings close out the year of waiting for Malaysia Airlines to pay out.

Diplomacy between countries is all a game of threats

Elements of diplomacy include tact and promise. Driving that carrot on the donkey's back like it's a stick shift and cranking the bollocks so they squeeze out the most just relations possible.

Fast break in first week sets off 2014 national road toll, 28 at lunch

Lined up head to knee to neck to torso and what we have is another year on the road tolls. The holidays never stop making a mull of it. You can't rest until your lungs are crushed or ripped apart from a torn windshield. Them's the brakes. Screeching as we notch SA atop a country of 28.

Easter road toll 2014 rests a dozen ahead of ANZAC weekend

'smiles riding into the breach, the beach, the trees that never hug back. Easter brings another road toll, celebration on the nation's roads as the tally takes a team effort, but this year we're down and out but 19 off the course. Western Australia making fun use of that extra sun.

Hottest year and The Ashes deflates national road toll 2013 to 27

Year's end comes quietly for the 2013/2014 Christmas and New Year's holiday road toll as the nation watches Australia reclaim The Ashes from the Poms. As it happens, the bodies are out for six and that's New South Wales still keeping its head above the bloody waters. But only just in a pool of 27.
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