The Wax Conspiracy

Easter road toll 2022 smashes through 14 chassis

Feel that chill gear up as two weekends in a row go for long drives off the cliff to neverwhere. Easter 2022 then into ANZAC day. What a time to be waking up a Wednesday thinking it's Friday again. The roads are calling, it's 14 this round. Not for the fortnight.

Not one to rest on the heads and shoulders flying through windshields, New South Wales reclaim the top spot with seven (7) during the Easter Operation timeframe. It's a pickup of two from the last outing. If you can feel the breeze and pollen getting into your lungs, lest we remember the notch of a Hilux having a bit of a roll in the paddock to beef up a stew.

Victoria bears toward the point on the map that doesn't go anywhere and stays the same from the year previous. This time, we see two (2), down a few from the five making use of body bags during Operation Compass. They got it on both sides, to level out the ploughing fields as both a pedestrian and a driver chalk one for each column.

Take a look in the side-view mirror and spot the encroaching rust of Tasmania, tying for second place. Up from 2021 but a single count is all it takes. Even if they ran an extra day, we'll give it to them for being that little patch at the bottom of the map, now sitting docked with stocks in the middle of the pack.

Slipping off the top, Queensland sidles in fourth with one (1) clawing at the undercarriage of metal that tunes itself along the bitumen. Between a motorcycle and a car, it was the former that's now also a former itself. A head-to-head match between people in their 60s and this is the kind of jousting we are left with when pool noodles are put away for the season.

South Australia are on the same level, one as well, and also with a ticket in the 60s. Operation Safe Long Weekend slams a whole bunch of words together as a 65-year-old behind a ute takes on and loses against a freight train up along the Copper Coast.

Rounding out the third of the fourth is Western Australia. Here though, we are shy of a couple of years, but still in the age range and also on a "coast." A 58-year-old motorcycle rider takes the clip, falls, short and at an intersection we meet.

Down now into the kneecaps of the beast, squatting out eggs like a fire sale with flames running down the aisles.

The Northern Territory drops one and zeroes out the Easter long weekend. Not a soul gone in sight. Enough for them to wander over to see if the marine and rough waters were fishing out any numbers worth catching. And nothing of interest was found.

The ACT holds steady, equal eighth, zero as well. Of course, like living in the nation's capital, you have to hope for better things ahead. They are looking forward to another long weekend to drown out their sorrows. Or at least for another round of catch-up as tomato sauce goes everywhere but on the sausage sanga.

Weary are the roads double stacking these long weekends. Easter, that shifty holiday, keeps its numbers close between 00.01 14 April 2022 through the weeds of 23:59 18 April 2022 for a generous count. Perhaps ANZAC may steal the leftover chocolate fruit for biscuits.

Ethan Switch

Written on Sunday, 24 April 2022

The Wax Conspiracy



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