The Wax Conspiracy

Bushfires cannot hold back the national Christmas holiday road toll 2019 up to 39 embers

Ashes silt the crashes over the course of the Christmas to New Year’s period with the national road toll charring 39 across Australia.

Setting the board a cinder New South Wales goes full tilt and two fingers to the sky with 11, burning back the pole position from Queensland last year. Leaning hard into the tally on momentum, the final hours of Operation Safe Arrival turn up an empty rush for higher numbers. “During the final day of Operation Safe Arrival, we saw too many drivers placing themselves and others at risk with their selfish and dangerous driving behaviours,” said Assistant Commissioner Michael Corboy.

One of the tied second place states, South Australia, blitzes out with 8 on the warm, so warm, roads over the Christmas period for Operation Safe Holidays. Perhaps in retribution for all the bushfires, a driver along Lameroo took against a tree and lost out. Still, one for the state flipping it up and over from four last year.

Across the arid roads through the lands up there, the Northern Territory ties up with second place at 8, four more than the year before. Ngukurr helps the territory pip it up seeds out, runs out, on the last day of counting and the first day of the year.

Holding pace from the previous chalky board of destruction, Victoria drowns it all out with another 7 in the black body bags. The numbers are raw and stark. For those watching on from the sidelines of the bitter Victorian roads, pedestrians and passengers are doing the bulk of the work to stay afloat in the sea of plasma floats and body moats.

Western Australia chose not life over the tracts of land with a net of 3 casing out the morgue, up a sum of two. One road train report from Cocklebiddy falls outside the window much like limbs at full speed past the bonnet. Near Bells Rapids, in the spirit of unity through melting chassis, an actual freight train of grain and pain takes out the driver. Alas, the road toll only counts wheels careening off the bitumen and asphalt.

Over the hills through Operation Romeo Sleigh, only 2 leg it up for Queensland, a mighty fall from eleven stakes. That or the news is quiet on their front with a question on if a skateboard counts as a vehicle for the tolling of the roads. Doesn’t help with interstate numbers making a mess of faces as a cyclist gets thrown into South Australia’s rack and pack.

Slipping back into the darkness of the gone, Tasmania wallows at the bottom with zero. Twas close to the end of Operation Crossroads with an ATV to foil things good but not so good though no as, “The male was wearing appropriate protective equipment at the time of the crash, which likely assisted in minimalizing injuries sustained.”

Nothing of note fell inside the ACT. Zero and also gone for the holidays. So noteless for the period that one person dead from a crash wasn’t even in the calendar week to count.

Fierce competition for bodies this season as the bushfires rage on past the midnight oil. And so it goes with the end of the year notching the Christmas and New Year’s period between 00:00 Friday 20 December 2019 and 23:59 Wednesday 1 January 2020. Fighting hard and fighting back, up there again against 2018 to sing it.

Ethan Switch

Written on Monday, 13 January 2020

The Wax Conspiracy

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