The Wax Conspiracy

Dozen more scrambled eggs on holiday road toll over easy 2008

Sizzle, crack, pop and taste twisted omelettes with the sunny-side up. Outperforming the previous holiday road toll season, 2008-2009 wrapped more in black to return to days above the half ton. Racking in 54 corpses between the period of December 19 and January 2, it returns from a frightful fill of last year.

Out again to hold on to the number one position and maintain its lead in the polls, Victoria with 16 manglings and crushings. One shy of the mark left in the skid marks of the year before. Well done run after kicking things off with WA and NT.

Closing in at second place, and showing a marvellous turn nearly three times over the benchmark of 2007-2008, the sunshine state of Queensland holds two candles at the roadside vigil with 11 bodies across the roads.

Rubber necking each other for a tie in third, the most populous and the largest states (of New South Wales and Western Australia respectively) clearing out their decks of all the face cards to rummy 10 a piece. Worth noting is that on the high of frivolities, NSW continued to notch a few more lifeless beings after the offical final siren.

Turning in an impressive run at the breakfast, the Northern Territory showed their hand with 5 to check in and bill themselves the fifth spot in the leaderboard. Four fingers more than their last seat at the table.

South Australia and Tasmania rough out the edges standing each at one. Tasmania, topping the list of cancer rates (not counting skin cancer) in a recent health report, proves that thinking on a tangent will not bring more drivers between a rock and a guardrail.

ACT, with a zero count, stands head down after failing to pick up the two passengers last seen at the games.

Ethan Switch

Written on Tuesday, 6 January 2009

The Wax Conspiracy



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