The Wax Conspiracy

Climbing attendance record fuels amensia on on-ground sports match

Confronted by the face of her long time rival, a competitor in a little known sport sparked an unheard controversy and wowed those in attendance. With a sheer audacity none have seen for far longer than the distance between two unknown points, Claretha Jameson and Jenna Somer produced a stunning display of championship mettle on their battle for glory.

Swimming through spectators along a field of crimson pink with a rod of immensurable strength. Jameson vaulted her efforts above that of her arch nemesis. Somer, coming to grips with the gravity of the situation, was initially caught off guard before establishing herself with grappling hooks hidden underneath her soles.

As the two adversaries continued their game of hamster and scientist, the crowd erupted with the explosionary reluctance of secrecy borne public.

At first one by one and then exponentially by folds of prime numbers under ten (and none over), the audience grew in size, quickly overtaking the seating allocation set aside for the event. Much to the dismay of organisers, the overflow contributed to a litany of problems unforeseen for the event.

Soon, with a deft call to a nearby fire house and local picnic grounds, the situation was handled in time for the final leg of the match.

Unfortunately, with the commotion concerning the allocation of seating, the spectators in the flow fold of prime numbers below five disrupted events too much. Left in the wake, a surly mob angered by events and demanding a rematch between the two women.

No date has been set for the rematch.

Ethan Switch

Written on Wednesday, 11 January 2006

The Wax Conspiracy

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