Goodbye, Australia. I have loved you.
Sydney Airport - too gaudy for words.
Still, I've already had two free taster drinks...
The many faces of korjo adaptors.
Singapore - YOUR CARPETS ARE DELIGHTFUL!
Ah, London. Where the weather is rubbish, people have watery eyes and pale complexions and are called either Moira or Duncan.
Safe and sound in the holy land. Well... I say "holy..."
Aww, fuck yeah!
The "do you want some bread with that?" is more food than I usually have for dinner so I'm gonna feel like an idiot when this pizza shows up.
Yeah, I'm an idiot.
Breakfast, round 1.
Missing: the little soy sausages I wolfed down at buffet.
At buffet? In buffet? In buffet solo?
Complete with replicas of the terracotta army.
Yeah, you like that, @barethrills? That was just one half of the spread. A large troop of very, very fat Israelis came in as I was taking that photo and headed straight for the table. Frankly, I'm lucky I got out with my life.
Ira! Ira, I am in you! @TheRealYLT
Christ, they don't mess about with coffee here.
Shit just got real, mang.
Then it got realer.
Then someone got stabbed.
Then I saw this smug son of a bitch.
Israeli street art if weird, man.
I mean, really fucking weird!
Bauhaus architecture on Rothschild in Tel Aviv.
Not sure if this counts as Bauhaus.
These three chappies.
Sage advice, wall. I'm on it!
Mexican for dinner. For @claredbear.
The bill came in this...
Basically the only reason I do these trips: swanning around in a bathrobe.
Please note the Eye of Sauron of my crotch there.
Just found out I gotta stay another night, so stuck with this rubbish view for another 24-hrs. Oh, and the, uh, bathrobe.
Lunch. Fattoush, made correctly. By which I mean in such a way that it'll eventually end up in my belly.
Heading home soon so gotta reacclimatise myself to what I usually have for dinner.
In other news, the lounge I'm in is playing Superstar by The Carpenters. Classy.
Can I? Should I?
If that Jesus mug weren't bad enough, how about pretending to be a Jain for.their tasty, tasty cooking?
Worst. Panini. Ever, Perth.
Seriously, anything that is not Sydney right now can go and get fucked.
They played a Coldplay concert on the monitors on the way into Sydney. It was kind of like, "Well, if we crash and we all go to hell, here's what it'll probably be like."
This was basically all I listened to my whole time overseas, and at such ear-shattering volume that I damaged my ears much in the same way the singer did when it forced him out of the band all those years ago. Good times.
Finally, what thirty-plus hours of little-to-no sleep does to a man. Except the hair, that's largely my own doing. That's it. I'm done. Good night.
Published on Friday, 8 March 2013
I hope that what I have written will be of some assistance.