The Wax Conspiracy

State of Origin 3: The Savage Caress of the Ill-Coiffured

With the series at 1-1, one would think that the advantage would lie with the home crowd. And, ugly and stupid as the may be, QLD ignored this, and just didn't have it in them to win the game. Looking at the half time score, one would also think "Zounds and Gadzooks! Aren't Queensland going to join us here at Suncorp?".

Thoughts like these were scarcely thinkable 15 seconds into the game. Possession kept getting thrown back at QLD, who managed not necessarily to completely bollocks things up, but at the same time, fail to score. It was Minichiello who interrupted this lopsided possession with a length of the field run that would end up in a penalty, and the beginning of a NSW points avalanche.

NSW really did shine in the area of defensive prowess, and QLD unzipped and exposed their weakest zones. The attack from NSW was simply too strong and crafty. At no time did QLD even look threatening or even malevolent. They looked more like a fat bully in a midday movie, who just received their comeuppance and is stuck thinking about the error of his ways while weeping into some greasy snack. HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, YOU STUPID FAT BASTARD? It was a shamefully lame end to a "series nail-biter" and all in maroon were guilty of wasting admission.

Croker seemed to have all his preparation based around acting like a twat; "He's been doing it all game - someone should poison all his pets!" shrieked one onlooker. Many agreed. One or two valiant QLD players seemed to cling to the individual dignity; lining up 2 very late "charity" tries. That is why they should be standing alone. The wage of poor quality football is paltry; not even enough for a bottle of paint thinner and a skanky whore to pull you out of hard earned doldrums.

Of the NSW team, it's hard to fault many of the players; all played at the same level - a notch above QLD. Standing out among them were Anasta (who failed to rise to Croker dirty tactics), King, who scored 3 tries and Minichiello, who seemed to be a catalyst for long loping runs deep into QLD territory.

25 years of State of Origin football - no refunds or returns. Damn.

Jimmy Weasel

Reviewed on Wednesday, 6 July 2005

The Wax Conspiracy




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