The Wax Conspiracy

Caringbah Bizzos: Like a phoenix 'n stuff

Caringbah "Bizzos", or businessman's club used to be small. And nigh upon dilapidated. As a venue for musical performance and the viewing of such things, it was not a personal favourite. Nor was it the favourite of quite a few bands. Pillars of Annoyance were strewn about the place, bad acoustics, bad light, smokey air. All the things negative that could be associated with a venue were, and quite tightly packed into this tiny room.

All this has changed.

The venue is new and sparkly and much bigger than the ruins of Bizzos past. The entrance is now a classier affair with far fewer smells, and not even a hint of paint fumes.

It is rumoured the 3 million was spent on the refurbishment, and with no-one called for confirmation, that figure won't be adjusted for quite some time. Poker machines are still present, but that should have been a given. The carpet is standard issue "daggy" from the same warehouse all clubs find their horrifying patterned carpets.

It's the new music venue downstairs that people are interested in, and if they're not, they should be. It now holds about 400 music fans. There are 2 levels from which to watch music. The outer ring from which drinks may be purchased, and the front of stage area, which is lower than the outer area. There sits a bordering bar upon which to lean or leave drinks. The front of stage area (for the time being (as construction is not quite complete)) also doubles as band equipment storage. the acoustics all through the music area are very clear; music has only the performers or the sound guy to blame for a bad sound.

The price of a beer has dropped remarkably in the music area. Is this an opening promotion? Or has management decided that city prices for drinks are just a silly idea for the suburbs? $10 for entry is a fair price for 4 more than decent bands. I can't remember the name of the 3rd band, however. It has a "7" in it.

The stage lights are an impressive sight. All manner of dazzling colours and psychedelia shine and flicker throughout each performance. The house lights, while less used, are also effective for use when trying not to fall up/down the unpainted cement stairs.

The signs of continuing construction are ever-present; the doors to the toilet are unfinished (ie, unpainted) and there is no mechanism (paper or dryer) in the mens room for the adequate drying of hands. One has to use the traditional method of "pants" to remove water and traces of communal soap cakes from their hands and fingers. Until building is complete, the best place to catch a disease (short of sharing drinks in the Shire) will be the soap cakes.

Jimmy Weasel

Reviewed on Monday, 14 July 2003

The Wax Conspiracy




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